Brainstorming... Bodyweight... Barbells... Boxing...

Having been out of the gym for close to two months, I feel totally disoriented. So, the goals I need to keep in focus are:

1) My title banner goals still stand: CoC #3 for reps, DL 485#, SQ 405#, BP 315#

2) I do want to get back to more bodyweight mastery: handstand pushups, hand balancing for time, ring dips, L-sits/L-dips, pistol squats, one-arm pullups, planche, etc.

3) I love frequent HIIT (esp. jump rope, plyometrics, kettlebells, tires, hammers, med balls, etc.), boxing, biking, and rowing.

So... I think I will finally just cave in and do Wendler's 5/3/1 program, with bodyweight assistance exercises (as per this article by Ryan Hurst).

On "off" days I will train grip + boxing drills (double-end, speed, jump rope) or grip + KB / biking / tire jumps and hammers.

So... hypothetically...

Monday - BP 5/3/1
Tuesday - grip + _____
Wednesday - SQ 5/3/1
Thursday - grip + _____
Friday - DL 5/3/1
Saturday - MP 5/3/1
Sunday - off

I'm going to need to start this sooner than later, or I'll just keep sitting on the fence and idling like I have been for the past several weeks. I still want to finish the 21-day KB program I've started, so I guess it will just have to be extra work on top of 5/3/1 until it's done.

Having taken some time away from the gym--and away from any formal program, for that matter--I can tell that, over time, I will gravitate back towards bodyweight training, dinosaur strong man style drills, and HIIT/metcon drills. Being a gym rat is just not in my nature. God, depression sucks.

Recent workout notes

Last week I had to deal with a neck strain (thanks a lot, SQ!), so I did a few days of jump rope, space mace, suspension dips and curls, ab wheel, sledge/tire, dino dumbbell movements, etc.

Thursday I went into the gym, but felt very sub-optimal, and was quite modest with my squats. I did the following (about an hour) as a circuit:

SQ: 12, 10, 10, 8, 6 @ 75, 105, 125, 145, 195 lb.
FSQ: 12, 10, 10, 8, 6 @ 75, 105, 125, 145, 195 lb.
db press: 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10 @ 50, 55, 60, 65, 70, 80 lb.
seated cable row: 12, 12, 12, 12, 12, 12 @ 100, 100, 110, 110, 120, 120 lb.
spider curl: 10, 10, 10, 10, 10, 10 @ 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, 80 lb.

I did a 30-minute workout on Saturday involving dino-db movements, space mace, and perfect pushups.

I'm headed into the gym now. We'll see what I pull off. Maybe I got "stale" this past couple weeks, so I'm willing to take it easy until the school year is over.

Fitness update(s) - 8 May -- 12 May

Thursday, 8 May 2014 
Shurg Rush
60 min., 221 lb. 

HSQ: 12, 10, 8, 6, 3, 3, 3, 2 @ 145, 165, 185, 215, 235, 255, 285, 305 lb.

[I went for three on my last set, but stalled halfway up. That was strangely gratifying. I had really found a weight that matched, and just surpassed, my ability. Until I get stronger, that is.]

hypers: 12, 9, 6 @ + 25, 35, 45 lb.

db Kelso shrug: 12, 9, 6 @ 80, 85, 90 lb.

[As much as I love dumbbells, I think these will be more effective with a barbell. I'll test it out next time, maybe Wednesday.]

bench shrug: 12, 12, 12 @ 235, 285, 335 lb.

[My spotter on the last set came over and said, "Whoa, that's a lotta weight!" I explained the lift and he grinned, with a glimmer of dawning comprehension. That's three out of three times I've had to gotten to explain my shrug exercises. #GospelOfKelso]

dip shrug: 12, 12, 12, @ + 70, 80, 90 lb.

[Fairly beastly. Me like. A kid came over and watched me on my last set, then asked, "What are those for?" I explained. He nodded, then slowly walked away, with a faint smirk, as if I'd just said my muscles are made of cheese. Clearly a lad still trapped the darkness of Non-Kelsotude.]

snatch shrug: 8, 6, 8* @ 235, 255, 275 lb.

[I realized that I should just deadlift the bar off the ground, in order to be able to use a truly snatch-wide grip without the risk of pinching my fingers on a rack. The last set was fun because, as my grip gave way, I hitched the bar up and grabbed it with a little narrower grip, shrugged again, felt my grip giving way, hitched it one more time into a standard shrug grip, and squeezed out one more rep. Fun times.]

+ + + 

Saturday, 10 May 2014 
Carpe Ferrum workout 
55 min., 220 lb. 
MOOD: I truly felt like crap for this workout. I don't know why, but part of the problem is that a late night out last week and a little family drama recently have left me feeling drained for a few days. Maybe allergies are hitting me hard, too. In any event, I knew I simply had to "punch the clock." An extremely "mental" workout, it nevertheless ended up being quite effective, all things considered.

FSQ: 10, 10, 10 @ 145, 165, 185 lb.

supinating db press: 10, 10, 10, 8 @ 55, 60, 65, 85 lb.

seated db curl: 10, 10, 10, 8 @ 30, 35, 35, 40 lb.

CL: 8, 8, 8 @ 115, 135, 155 lb.

db flye: 10, 10, 10 @ 45, 55, 60 lb.

seated cable row: 10, 10, 10 @ 150, 170, 170 lb.

unilateral cable row: 10/10, 10/10, 10/10 @ 80, 90, 110 lb.

[I did these seated on the floor and used a little torso rotation to maximize the range of motion. Not too shabby.]

+ + + 

Monday, 12 May 2014 
Carpe Ferrum workout
50 min., 224 lb. 

power CL: 6, 5, 4, 2*, 4, 2* @ 135, 155, 175, 185, 175, 185 lb.

[Once my form got sloppy at 185 lb., I ramped it down a bit, but then decided to go for 185 again. On the last set, I failed on a third attempt, and now my right wrist is a little tweaked. Fear not: I'll be fine.]

unilateral db hang jerk (?): 10, 8, 6, 4/6 @ 50, 55, 60, 65 lb.

[Instead of a one-hand snatch, I devised these in order to work my lats, traps, hams, and posterior chain on the pull, and to perform a fluid press to the top. My copy of Kubik's Dinosaur Training arrived today, so I'd like to thank him for inspiring me to try these out. I squeezed out two extra reps at the end to bring my left arm up to speed.]

incline db flye: 12, 10, 8, 7* @ 50, 55, 60, 65 lb.

Grip training ... and then a Shurg Rush - 30 April 2014

Crush grip training
30 min., 224 lbs 
MOOD: felt ready but got easily distracted at times... because I trained in my office and babies were around; all right-hand reps and closes were "with authority" 

warm-up (9 min) - space mace, light grippers, stretching

CoC #1.5 - 6/6 closes
CoC #2 - L 1 close, R 1 close, L near close, R 1 close
CoC #2 (chalk) - L near close, R 1 close, L 1 close, R 1 close
CoC #1.5 iso-hold - L 20 sec, R 25 sec. (used an envelope as gap-release indicator)
CoC #1.5 - L 8 closes, R 8 closes

74-lb dino-db hold - L 33 sec., R 36 sec.
74-lb dino-db hold - L 35 sec, R 37 sec.

[Then about an hour later I got to the gym for trap day...] 

Shurg Rush
50 min, 224 lbs 
MOOD: felt stoked and focused, worked quickly but not carelessly 

hypers - 18, 15 + 10 lbs, 12 + 25 lbs, 9 + 45 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

Kelso db shrug - 12, 10, 10 @ 85 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

bench shrug - 12, 10, 12 @ 225, 245, 265 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

dip shrug - 12, 10, 10 @ 70 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

snatch shrug - 6, 8, 8 @ 235, 225, 225 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

rear shrug - 6, 6, 6 @ 275 lbs
Hindu squats - 40

+ + +

At one point, as I did Hindu squats--which I assure you the vast majority of gym rats don't even know about, and probably even fewer would be willing to try--I heard one older gym bro muttering to another older gym bro, "Oh, he's workin' his legs and his back. Heh. Yeah, mumble grumble, etc." Was it about me? I don't know. But as I found myself surrounded by dudes who do uneven straight bar curls in the squat rack, shout about "thowin' them bitches [25 lb dumbbells]", and have as large a torso as their legs are puny... I just had to look to the future. I'm doing what works for me, and it's bound to raise some eyebrows. To wit, I got queried yet again about bench shrugs. I'm happy to share new ideas.

Patience, Humility, Confidence, Persistence... Stay tuned.

P.S. Since I know that my millions of readers are as interested in the minutiae as I am, I should add that the above figures for my grip training indicate a significant step forward--or, if you will, a significant return to where I was in last 2012. I believe that by summer I will have a CoC #2.5 to train with. 

Heavy-ass weight!

No delusions of grandeur here, don't worry. I don't even consider myself a bodybuilder.

All the same, Coleman's quote is immortal. Just replace "bodybuilder" with your strength-training goal and it fits.

Today was a "life fitness day". I didn't hit the gym. I didn't touch a metal weight of any kind. The most I did in terms of "fitness" training, in fact, was some core work I'll describe below.

Today I woke up, played with my kids for a bit, then drank some milk and a beer (!), and napped again for a few hours.

Then I really got up, had some oatmeal and eggs and coffee and my usual humble supplements. Then I did some core work before my wife and I took the babies on a stroller walk for nearly an hour. When we got back I practiced hand balancing for about 10 minutes, between bursts of yard work, which then shifted to me mowing the front yard.

But here I am rambling--and on my own blog, no less!

The core work I did this morning is, according to Tamir B. Katz, M.D., a "flat bridge".

Or you could just call it a straight bitch.

Of which more in a moment.

I started with two 50-second neck bridges. Felt great on the hamstrings and back.

Then I rolled over into a butts-up headstand... and slowly backed my feet up until I was into a basically horizontal, hands-free plank position.

On my forehead.

Yeah. That's the flat bridge which Katz presents.

I held that for 30 seconds, twice.

Then I tried it again for another 30 seconds.

I can't find an image of what Katz advises, so here are some photo grabs from a pre-publication version of his book that I printed out a few years ago:

When I got inside from mowing the yard, I tried Katz's flat bridge again for 30 seconds. Then I tried it on a chair, thinking that a higher elevation might provide a way to train the exercise more progressively and less aggressively.

How wrong I was.

Friends, I tell you: Just stick with the floor.

The two fulcra are how far back you position your feet and and how "flat" you put your face on the mat. The closer your feet are, and the higher your rest on the crown of your head, the easier it is. And vice versa.

Anyway, what are the heavy-ass weights which birthed the title of this post?

Amidst hand balancing and yard work, I finally got my "bigger" dino-dumbbell out of the plastic bucket this evening.

And, holy cats, is it ungainly.

It's at least 10 lbs heavier than I had intended, and, honestly, may not even be symmetrically heavy.

Which...makes it that much cooler, in a weird, dinosaur way.

That bad boy weighs in at just shy of 74 lbs, with a 2-inch grip. 

I chipped off a little bit of it today trying to get it out of the bucket, but if I want to, I can just patch it up with a few dollops of cement. Seeing, however, as it's heavy-as-shit already, I will not be doing any patching up until it gets more chipped over time. 

Grip training + AYCE = WINNING!

Grip training
30 min., 225 lbs.
MOOD: felt groggy and a bit cranky when I got home; spent some time puttering in the garage and eventually felt ready

warm-up: space mace, ghetto gripper, stretching, Chin Na movements (10 min.)

CoC #1.5 - 6 closes

CoC #2 - LH 1 near-close, RH 1 close
[I squeezed so hard on my first LH attempt that at the release I got dizzy enough to have to brace myself on my heavy bag. Fun times!]

CoC #2 - LH 1 near-close, RH 1 close

CoC #2 - LH 1 body-English close, RH 1 close

CoC #1.5 iso-squeeze - LH/RH 15 sec./15 sec.
[used a piece of a thin metal rule to detect when the ends separated]

1.5" pinch block @ 24 lbs. - LH 47 sec., RH 55 sec.
1.5" pinch block @ 24 lbs. - LH 50 sec., RH 50 sec.
[This last set reminded me how grip training is intensely, perhaps uniquely, "mental" in its intensity. I could almost feel myself willing my fingers to clamp harder near the end of my first RH pinch. Then I did the same for my second LH pinch, yet, significantly, let my mind wander during my last RH pinch.]

+ + +

And then, boys and girls, I did a Bad Thing: I gave into the urge to SQUAT MOAR and drove up to the gym for a set of FSQ.

FSQ: 8, 6, 3, 3, 3, 2 @ 145, 195, 215, 235, 255, 275 lbs.

+ + + 

Hooray: I believe those two reps at 275 are a new PR for me.

I'm pretty certain that I could front squat 285, which was the figure I estimated was 90% of my back squat. Once I achieve that FSQ, I will reintegrate SQ into my regimen.

All such certainties aside, however, I am willing to wait until I actually FSQ a couple reps at 285 before bringing back the SQ, and even when I do so, I'll be opting for a high-bar, narrowish-stance, Olympicky SQ instead of the low bar powerlifting SQ. FSQ helps your liftoff on the DL, and my Kelso Shurg Rush program is intended to augment the back-extension phase.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

This FSQ set was a perfect example of the benefit I got from Perryman's Squat Every Day. Just as some fellows tell their wives that they're headed to the store for some milk, I rather spontaneously told my wife, "I'm going to go squat, be back soon." I went in my Birkenstocks, shorts, a T-shirt and a sweatshirt, bee-lined for the squat rack, and got the whole set done in about 20 minutes. Before my very last rep, I took a long moment to collect my thoughts, assess my abilities, and then drove down for what turned out to be a second PR. ("How you feel is a lie.") Admittedly, I thought I was about to tip forward halfway up, but I pulled through, let out a small bark at the top, racked the bar, and stepped away, saying, "Well, wasn't that something?"

Felt. Totally. Awesome!

Speaking of "feeleens," I had some DOMS today in my thighs, and was of a mind to take it easy, but I keep coming back to the mysterious and too little known truth that it's extremely difficult to (really) "overtrain" squats.

Tomorrow is a Shurg Rush, and I will be throwing in a set of HSQ or ZSQ. Stay tuned.

---------------------

P.S. 

Almost forgot. I made my workout cards today, so I'm just as curious as you are what my Even Keel 1A workout is for next week. I've already got this week's 1B programmed. 

P.P.S. 

My first dino-db is complete! Turns out, lubricating the container actually makes it harder to extract the dried cement, since it forms a moisture lock with the plastic. It's about 34 lbs. and the handle ended up being a little longer than I wanted. The measurement I had taken of the first side of cement, and used for the second portion, was too high: once the water evaporated, the concrete itself finished "shorter away" from my intended handle width. Oh well. I laid the first half of my next, 60+ lbs dino-db today, which was a nifty wrist warm-up for my grip session, to boot. 

The new half is darker until residual moisture and silicone lubricant are gone. If you want to make one of these for yourself, here's a little heads-up: when setting the second half, you need to drill a small hole in the handle so that air in the pipe can escape and allow the fresh cement to fill the pipe. Oh, also, you should tap all around the bucket to get as many air bubbles out of the cement to the surface. Happily enough, this procedure splashed some of the cement onto the handle, which gives an otherwise smooth pipe some nice grit.